The Unofficial Official Simulator

By
Chet Robot


Available:
Dick Cheney
Richard Perle
Condi Rice
Don Rumsfeld
Paul Wolfowitz


More officials to come...


The Official Simulation Act of 2002 created the Dept. of Official Simulation (DoOS) and tasked it with minimizing time wasted on media availability by certain U.S. Government officials who have been designated as essential to national security.

DoOS makes available for press conferences and interviews simulated officials virtually identical to the originals with regard to talking points, lucidity and veracity.

Simulated Official Media Availability
These simulated government officials are taking questions in conformance with the Official Simulation Act of 2002. All quotes are authentic. No government official was harmed in the making of this simulation.
            Ask Dick Cheney:
Yes?       Show citations.
            Ask Richard Perle:
Yes?       Show citations.
            Ask Condoleeza Rice:
Yes?       Show citations.
            Ask Don Rumsfeld:
Yes?       Show citations.
            Ask Paul Wolfowitz:
Yes?       Show citations.
   
A Busy, Busy, Busy Production.